It takes courage to reveal the innermost workings of your mind to another in a therapeutic relationship. However, it takes a whole new level of courage to admit to yourself that not only is it time to sort out the 'stuff' that's getting in the way of loving yourself without condition, but also acknowledging what it is and where it came from.
Set yourself free
So often, the things that hold you back are the things that have kept you safe; your hidden shield. They protected you in some way, kept you where you (perhaps thought you) wanted to be. It feels comfortable, it's what you know; sometimes like a pair of fluffy slippers, other times like a strict parent enforcing the rules.
It feels safe.
You know who you are and where you stand, even when it's painful. Even when you can feel a destructive force at play. It feels far better to be within the boundaries you know than to be set free.
“I’m scared, who will I be without all this pain?”
You will be the most amazing version of you.
Connect the pieces
For many, it is hard to see the connection between what keeps you safe, albeit unhealthily, and what you need to let go of. Once acknowledged, it's obvious; a real light bulb moment occurs. It is so important to not just see how they are connected but to look at how it has served you during this time in the emotional wilderness.
What did you needed protecting from and what do you stand to lose or gain if that shield isn't there?
Remember, you have so much to gain by dropping your shield and stepping out of that rusty armour, allowing yourself to see how amazing you really are. Allow the world to see your true self in all its beauty and majesty. Marvel at how well you looked after yourself, meeting your needs in the only way you knew how. Acknowledging that it served you well, but that it no longer serves you now.
Now is your time to shine.
Enlist support – step out of the shadow
The next step is the most crucial. It is your life's quest. Stand tall and proud, congratulate yourself for stepping forward, out of the shadows and into the bright sunlight. Look around you.
Seek out new, healthy ways of serving your own needs.
If you don't yet know how to do this, then reach out. Find the right coach for you. Someone who has been there, knows of your pain, and is now living a life filled with self love. A coach to be your advocate and biggest supporter, to offer you hope and hold space while you grow into your most authentic self. The right coach will help you identify the limiting beliefs that hold you back, gently and effectively releasing them, cheering you on to the finishing line.
We all need a helping hand when life’s contrast challenges us. The right coach will show you positive ways of thinking, strategies to build personal resilience and the tools to lead the life of self love that you so want and deserve.
Rejoice in your new life. Search for all that is good, every day. Know that you can change. Take comfort in the knowledge that if I can change, then so can you.
You deserve to live your best life.
Reach out, we can walk this path together.
Blessings and love
“I just love being around Gill, her energy is amazing, she positively sparkles. She’s a positive delight to be around and her big smile always makes me want to giggle even when I've been feeling very sad.
I always feel supported, understood and cared for by Gill. She has so much empathy and intuition and quickly helped me get to the bottom of things. I really feel I could trust her with my innermost secrets; working with her has helped me understand myself and healed many of my deepest wounds.
I highly recommend Gill as a professional and caring coach, she is highly trained and knowledgeable and uses a variety of different techniques in the sessions.”
"Amazing results, really, honestly, I have been so fortunate to work with you. So grateful to you Gill for your wonderful calm, gentle manner and your talent in getting me to talk, not difficult about most subjects except when it comes to talking about myself."
“I had almost always been successful at interviews in the past but, after being made redundant from a middle management job I loved, in a quite brutal process, this was no longer the case. I had several interviews but kept coming a "close second" and each setback left me feeling more and more anxious and disheartened. Usually, I think my colleagues would describe me as upbeat and positive. When two lots of interview feedback was around my low enthusiasm levels I realised that I was not presenting the real me at interviews. Having had an amazing session with Gill a couple of years before I approached her for a coaching session.
Firstly, Gill tapped into my inner demons and left me feeling calmer than I had for weeks. She then worked on my positivity, using a visualisation technique I could practice just before an interview. The following week I had two interviews and, after Gill’s help, I felt really confident going into them. I was delighted to be offered both jobs, including one that I really wanted. Seeing Gill made such a difference and was well worth the investment as it helped me to secure an interesting, well-paid job again. I cannot recommend her highly enough.”